Too Beautiful to Live

It was a typical evening on Too Beautiful to Live, the Seattle radio show that has been happily predicting its own demise since it launched 11 months ago, and host Luke Burbank was getting ready to share a special bit of audio he'd come across online. People had been trying to suppress this audio file, forcing its deletion from websites that were hosting it, but as fast as it came down it would pop back up somewhere else, and now Burbank was going to play it for the world. "What it is, is a tape of George Brett, longtime Kansas City Royal third baseman, and he's... it's right before a baseball game, and he's mic'd up, they're going to interview him for some reason, you know, probably during the game, but they have the microphone turned on early, and he's telling a fellow player named Tony Peña, longtime catcher in the major leagues, a story about a time when, well, uh, he pooped his pants."

The rest...